After realizing how far in 2010 I did stray from the Lord, my first love, and did not even realize it, I am on a journey now to return to my first love and put Him back in first place in every area of my life. I am soon to be starting a new study through the first workbook of Thin Within by Judy Halliday, and I am very excited in what God will do in this time :)
I've been sick the past week and a half after my children were sick and one still recovering so we have been just doing a lot of recovering and relaxation.
If God leads I will be posting my journey through the next Bible study I do in Thin Within. I want to really live it, to not just treat it like a book, but keep my eyes on the Lord and not the book and see how He works in me. The song that comes to mind is that one that talks about I don't wanna go through the motions, I don't wanna go one more day without your all consuming, passion inside of me...
Thats the thought I am looking at today and seeking that passion...more later!
I read something on a blogfriend's blog a few days ago and it has really stuck to me. Something I knew but something I had stopped remembering, like when I read it I had an "a-ha" moment.
She said and I will quote it: "I see a picture of a cup... me holding a cup... and coming to Him to fill it. It's not a bucket. Not a vat. Just a cup...enough for this day... and He loves for me to come and be and loved and be filled. It's His joy to fill me, and He loves the time we spend together. And I am all the more because of it."
I also had this come to my mind:
You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings. Psalm 23:5
This is all I need. I don't need to expect more of anything past today. Because when I rest in His perfect provision each day, each moment, He overfills my cup and gives me more than enough of what I will ever need. This brings me peace and comfort today.
Galatians 4:6 (NLT) "And because we are his children, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, prompting us to call out, "Abba, Father."
I love Him and I just want to call out, "Abba, Father" each moment of every day so that He is my constant and that I am constantly abiding in Him letting Him fill me up overflowing.
So I feel I am entering a new season, a new start, in a lot of areas in my life. My one word resolution in 2011 would be "REFRESH." I want to be refreshed most importantly in my relationship with the Lord, and also in every area of my life. It seems 2010 was a year of a lot of striving and trying to control on my part, and not letting the Lord. So its time for a new start.
I am returning to a wonderful Grace based program that helped me release weight and grow so close to the Lord and break free from many areas of my life that kept me stuck. I am going back there and going to spend this year working on things the Lord wants to do on the inside of me. I am letting go slowly of fears of "letting go", fears of the "unknown" and just going to believe and trust Him. I tell you that me trying to control and strive to do the things "I" felt the Lord wanted me to do on my own, makes out for one miserable heavy burdened heart and life.
So I will be saying Lord, take my burdens, because He says...
"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28
I am excited for this new start.
The song that I think of...a line in it says, "it feels like I'm falling and thats what its like to believe." I will continue to remind myself that if I feel like I'm falling just know I am believing and HE has me in His hands! :) I am thankful that the Lord is helping me to listen to Him and stop trying to manage things on my own.
